The Vegan Council of Great Britain has today issued a statement, declaring the new £5 note ‘kosha‘, but only when used to snort a pre-approved list of synthetic drugs.
One of the drugs on the ‘whitelist’ is poor quality imported cocaine. This is despite the fact that the production of cocaine kills tens of thousands of people, millions of animals, and also causes extreme environmental damage.
It has been declared a pragmatic and necessary evil, for a number of reasons:
- Most vegans are too poor to have a note in a higher denomination than £5 after buying a gram.
- It is seen as imperative in order to carry on the sesh and expand consciousness
- In the case of the 2c family, consumption is keeping the psytrance scene alive.
Another substance to make the cut is ketamine, even though human usage deprives addicted horses of a much needed fix.
Big Karma is absolutely against this decision, and would like to reaffirm their belief that such drugs should only be snorted through a rolled up leaf, ripped up scratchcard or shitty club flyer.
Below, a sad horse crying due to a lack of readily available wonk. For just £5 a month, you can sponsor a horse’s ketamine supply. Contact Big Karma to find out more.